Strengthen your writing with 4 powerful word swaps. Learn when to cut “suddenly,” “felt,” “saw/heard,” and “seemed” for cleaner, sharper prose.
Quick reminder: you can use any word you want during your first draft.
The goal of drafting is to get the words down, not make them perfect.
Making them strong comes later — that’s where gentle word swaps help.
Writing isn’t about banning words.
It’s about choosing the right tool at the right moment.
These four words aren’t “bad.” They’re simply easy to overuse.
When they show up too often, they flatten tension, drain emotion, and weaken immersion.
Think of this as a line-edit checklist, not a commandment. 💛
What You’ll Learn
- four overused words in writing
- what to use instead of “suddenly,” “felt,” “saw/heard,” and “seemed”
- how to create stronger emotional beats
- how to remove filters for more immersive scenes
- how Christian writers can write with clarity and intention
If you’re a Christian fiction writer who wants cleaner, more immersive prose without losing authenticity or heart, this guide will help you edit with clarity and confidence.
1. Trim “Suddenly” — Use Action That Creates Its Own Shock
“Suddenly” tells the reader they’re supposed to feel urgency.
But urgency should come from the moment itself.
💡 Example
❌ Suddenly, the lights flickered out.
✅ The lights snapped off, swallowing the room in black.
Let the moment jolt the reader on its own.
Learn more in 5 Pacing Tricks That Make Your Scenes Instantly More Gripping.
2. Trim “Felt” — Show the Body Reacting Instead
“Felt” is a report of emotion, not the experience of it.
It creates distance instead of connection.
💡 Example
❌ She felt nervous walking in.
✅ Her palms dampened on the doorknob, and her breath caught halfway in.
Readers connect through embodied detail, not explanation.
Deepen emotional writing with The Emotional Echo Technique.
3. Trim “Saw / Heard” — Remove the Filter
“Saw” and “heard” make the reader watch the character watching the scene.
Cutting them removes the filter and drops readers straight into the action.
💡 Example
❌ He heard footsteps rushing toward him.
✅ Footsteps pounded behind him — too fast, too close.
No distance.
No camera lens.
Just immersion.
Learn more in How to Write Realistic Dialogue.
4. Trim “Seemed” — Use It for True Uncertainty, Not Filler
“Seemed” is helpful when you truly want ambiguity.
But too much of it weakens clarity and authority.
💡 Example
❌ The hallway seemed endless.
✅ The hallway stretched on, long and airless.
Reserve “seemed” for moments of spiritual tension, misunderstanding, or unreliable perception.
For emotional distortion and subtlety, see If You Want Your Scenes to Break Hearts, Start Here.
Why This Matters for Christian Writers
Christian storytelling thrives in clarity — not complexity, not clutter, not overwriting.
These swaps help you write:
- cleaner
- stronger
- more immersive
- more emotionally honest
- more spiritually grounded
They remove noise so the reader can feel the heart of the moment, not get caught in filler words.
These micro-edits also help your message shine through with grace and accessibility, especially for readers who are emotionally invested in the story’s spiritual arc.
FAQ: Word Swaps for Stronger Writing
Are these words wrong to use?
Not at all. They’re just easy to overuse.
Should I delete all of them?
No. Use these swaps intentionally during revisions, not drafting.
Why do these words weaken immersion?
They create distance, tell emotion instead of showing it, or flatten pacing.
Can I use these swaps in dialogue too?
Absolutely — but only when they strengthen character voice.
How do these help Christian fiction specifically?
They make emotional moments clearer, gentler, and more impactful without dramatics.
Key Takeaway
Don’t ban these words — just use them with intention.
Choose the detail, the action, the rhythm, or the image that carries the emotion more honestly.
Small edits → big clarity → immersive scenes.
🔥 Cyber Monday: The Christian Writer’s Guide
If you want to master:
- pacing
- emotional depth
- show don’t tell
- immersive description
- character voice
- word choice
- drafting AND revising
…you don’t need more isolated tips.
You need a writing system.
The Christian Writer’s Guide gives you a 3–6 month writing + editing plan so you can finish your book with clarity and confidence.
And it’s on sale for Cyber Monday.
Inside, you’ll get:
✨ line-editing checklists
✨ emotional writing templates
✨ dialogue and pacing guides
✨ structure frameworks
✨ scene templates
✨ revision worksheets
✨ your full writing roadmap
👉 Don’t rewrite the same chapter again next year — let’s move forward with clarity.
Pen and Polish 